Wednesday 24 October 2007

I was wrong (M)

I was wrong.

While, yes, I can be slightly shall we say “overconfident” at times (I blame 4 years at Santa Barbara), I am always the first to admit when I am wrong and especially as of lately, to ask for help if needed.

I moved today to London.

I expected it be easy. I mean, I moved over 6000 miles from San Francisco to Zurich 2 years ago, how could a little move to London, a mere one hour and thirty minute flight, be so difficult? It was 100 times more so.

You know that feeling, when your broken heart physically aches, the air suddenly feels so thin you gasp for air and your body is suddenly removed from the physical place in which it stood. You are no longer a part of the environment but rather merely an invisible observer, watching the world pass by in a supernatural slow motion. You know that feeling, we have all been there.

As I sat on the plane, with watery eyes and an occasional teardrop which disobediently escaped making a run down my cheek, I suddenly realized, I was wrong. It is not the experiences, the trips around the world and exciting adventures that give us meaning or happiness; it is the people in them. Obvious, right? But wouldn’t it be nice to have both??


Ich wünsche, dass der Schmerz, die Traurigkeit zu verschwinden aufhalten würde. Aber mann fühlt Schmerz nur, wenn mann einen großen Verlust fühlt. Ich bin glücklich, etwas so wunderbar gehabt zu haben, solchen großen Schmerz jetzt zu haben, dass es gegangen ist. Dort immer wird ein Ort in meinem Herzen für Die Schweiz und jene sein zu dem ich bin geworden nah mit. Leben ist eine lustige Reise, und, wer wirklich weiß, was der Morgen bringt?

Friday 12 October 2007

Random Swiss Facts- Part 2 (F)

Please see my quick note at the top for Part 1 if you have not already.

1) “The right of Swiss women to vote and stand for federal elections only came in 1971, and women’s right to vote in Appenzell-Rhoden (one of the cantons) was only passed in April 1991.” – Insights Guide Switzerland

First, few women work in professional careers, hence the abundance of secretaries here, which also leads me to one of Switzerland’s greatest mysteries, “Just what exactly do secretaries here do???”

Although, before I continue, there are some very good ones out there, and in their defense, are not normally treated so well. But then again, unfair treatment is something you simply need to learn to accept, unless you are a married Swiss man (think US about 40 years ago).

Upon my first day of work commuting into the Basel office, I boarded the morning first class train from Zurich to Basel. Seat after seat was filled with tall, skinny white guy in black suit. Upon arriving at the office, I was then introduced to colleague after colleague, whose appearance held no distinction other than white guy, black suit, with a name such as “*&%$” “&*@#” and “#*^%”. To this day, I have trouble differentiating the people at the firm.

The attitude in the workforce here is the following:

Why would we pay you and promote you if you are just going to have babies and quit? But don’t worry, we will take care of your husband for you.”

Actually, I digress, this isn’t the attitude, this is what is explicitly said. If we were in the States, I could probably have had half the firm fired for some of the things that were said to me as well as my colleagues. But I am no feminist, this not a political blog, and we are not in America (some Americans have trouble figuring this out), so I would prefer to not go into this subject. Instead, I moved to London (for many other reasons as well). I mean, I do have this thing for overweight, pale guys with bad teeth….

4) There is no single culture here. This fact leads me to one of Switzerland’s second greatest mysteries which is twofold, “How do people meet each other?” And “Where are all the single people??”

Although, as it is socially unacceptable to be single here ( I have been informed that all single girls are on a desperate hunt for a relationship and that many Swiss guys are too shy to even approach a girl), troubled relationships with a false pretense of perfection are common, and so is cheating. Again, please do not take offense to this as this is just a generalization. What you do find a lot of are people who have been together for many years, usually since school years that stay together because, well, who wants to be that loser single person (such as myself).

I get asked a lot by friends back at home about the guys and bar scene here, but to be completely honest, I have no answer, because there isn’t one (at least compared to American standards). However, upon my trips to the States I do become overwhelmed and admittedly a bit frightened at being attacked by the “Marina guy.”

What they do have here is lounges, lots of them. And the purpose of going to a bar is not to meet people, but to hang out with the people you came with. Strange concept, huh? Why would you want to hang out with just your friends?

But you will most certainly not find the big groups of girls out for a night on the town. Some groups of guys, but they consist mainly of a bunch of stuffy Swiss bankers, still dressed in suit and tie, whose look is normally complemented by the slightly slicked back hair and air of “I am utterly boring and dull, but hey, I have money so I am great”.

I would love to bring my Cali girls here for just one night on the town in Zurich. I am sure we would all be arrested.

Random Swiss Facts- Part 1 (F)

OK, before you read this, please refer to my Disclaimer of Liability at the top, it has come to my attention, that this posting was slightly misinterpreted by some Swiss colleagues.

I would like to emphasize that these are meant to be entertaining and do not necessarily reflect my opinion on Switzerland. I have a very positive impression of this country and am quite sad to depart. Any country, this size, which can achieve one of the highest standards of living and an economy which is recognized globally has my sincere respect.

But above all, I have made some very strong relationships which I know that regardless of time, will always remain true. Beneath the mounds of makeup and designer clothes of the Swiss (only in the Zurich region actually..it is like the LA of Switzerland) the substance behind a relationship once formed, is one of the strongest you will find, and I am lucky to have discovered that.

So, now that we have that whole touchy feeling thing clarified, let's move back into the more humorous portion of this posting.

I mean, if you cannot make fun of yourself, you are taking life way too seriously.

Every country has a story to tell or interesting fact to be learned. Here are just a few of those I believe to be worth mentioning.

But before, I begin; one clarification. No, I am not the only brunette here. You are thinking of Sweden. I live in Switzerland. They are two separate countries.

1) “The 16th century Genevese were the most decadent citizens of Switzerland. Their moral plateau was a city statute that levied a modest charge on men who kept more than one mistress at a time.”- Insights Guide Switzerland.

Hmmm…French influence definitely evident there. One wonders if this was a moral point, or simply an attempt to keep the playing field as equal as possible so that one man was not hoarding all the beautiful women.

My personal opinion is that the law was created by an unattractive man without any social graces. He was most likely the lone child at the high school dance hiding behind the bleachers watching in jealousy at the other girls and guys dancing, who upon summoning enough courage to ask the "hot girl" to dance, was laughed at and rejected. This man grew to become a powerful politician and then used his newly founded power for revenge.

This phenomenom of men using power to overcome shortcomings is prevalent throughout history including modern times in the U.S. as well. Haven't you noticed how all the men in Washington D.C. (political capital) are short??? Hmmm...small man complex there for sure. Think Napolean.

Either that, or the law was put forth by a business owner frustrated over the lack of productivity from his employees due to their very “long lunches” and charging hours for "working late."

2) If a Swiss guy tries to pick up a Swiss girl at a bar, within the first five minutes she will inevitably ask, “What do you do?” And “How much money do you make?”

First of all, I should quickly point out that this situation is not very common. Swiss guys don’t normally pick up on or even approach a girl at a bar. This question is therefore normally asked usually after the first non-date date (Swiss don’t believe in dating, they just “hang out together”).

However, in a culture in which the role of a woman is to simply stay at home and have babies and the man is the sole income provider, then her desired lifestyle is completely dependent on what he makes. So, why shouldn’t she ask this question?? I mean, wouldn’t you?

Thursday 11 October 2007

The Thread (M)

If you are merely hanging on by a thread for too long, it will break, and you will fall.
Your only chance of survival is to have a strong net below to catch you when you fall.

Given the lifestyle I have chosen to lead, I often find myself precariously hanging by that thread. The minute I set myself on some sturdy ground, I recklessly swing back out there in an almost sado-masochistic manner, and I admit, I have fallen, a lot.

Yet I am still miraculously standing, and even more miraculously is the impenetrable net I have amazingly constructed below. This net is comprised of family, friends, colleagues, and even strangers whom I have met or who have entered this whirlwind of my life and supported me along the way. Some consciously, others not, but regardless, I don’t think I could ever possibly thank the many people who have supported me along the way and for whom I am eternally grateful.

So this part below is super cheesy as it does sound a bit like I just won an Emmy or something, but at this point, successfully making it to London would be just as great an achievement for me. In California terms, we like to say that the following is a “Shout Out” to some (but certainly not all) the people who have helped me along the way.

These people include my high school friends who albeit the different directions we have chosen, still encourage me wherever my passion lies, my college friends who have seen me through it all, my Deloitte Divas, who are simply some of the most amazing people I have met and whose successes I am so proud of and who always open up their doors and make available their time when I am back in town, my SF roomies at the old 1788 Union Street who were like my little temp family, the Fluehgasse 7 boys, whom I would never have survived Zurich without and who have opened up their home several times during my homeless phases and could always make me feel better with a “Awww..Ri, Ri” and a big hug after a bad day as well as my neighbor in the crack house next door who offered up his lamp and allowed me to come over and use his couch and TV at 10:00pm so I didn’t have to stand over the sink in the dark to eat dinner alone as it took 2 months for the couch to get delivered. My close Swiss colleagues whom I will miss dearly, as well as those colleagues at the firm who went out of their way to welcome me into a sometimes uncomfortable environment.

I of course, will not forget the Malura family who opened up their home to a stranger while I was in Munich, my E&Y expat colleagues all over the world..whose unexpected sametime (instant messenger) popups always put a smile on my face when I was feeling down and for the good times at Oktoberfest…will see you same time same place next year!

Of course there are my abroad friends from Barcelona, the Altgasse Maedchen from Vienna, and most recently, my “chicas guapas roomies en Costa Rica” aka “old women of the group” whom I seem to meet up with all over the world.


Then there is my family, who regrettably live all over the country making it difficult to see them often, but when I am in town, it is like no time has passed in between.

Right now, I cannot thank enough however, everyone who has helped me on my transition to London, which has turned into a bit of a horrific ordeal, only further worsened as a lot of the blame was my fault due to mistakes I made processing the paperwork to get into the UK resulting in finding myself homeless, all of my belongings divided into several apartments (mainly Kevin and Dave’s cellar), and sleeping from floor to couch to futon to mattress on the floor (luxury-thanks Colm!), but worse, missing my friend’s wedding as I am literally stuck in Switzerland just waiting, unemployed for many weeks (which I have trouble enjoying).

To make it worse, the end is nowhere near as upon my arrival in London, I will have to start the whole process all over again. But I am extremely lucky, as I have a strong net of people who have even already offered their places and put up with me popping in and out already while interviewing and looking at some flats supporting me along the way.

But first, and foremost, it is my parents whom I most grateful for. As I am sure that while their preference would be to have me close nearby, they always still support and encourage me on my next adventure.

I often feel guilty having to rely so much as well as fall back on so frequently this net to catch me when I fall. While a net is there to support you, you still put pressure on it and disrupt it every time you do. And at the end of the day, the climb back up, you still need to make alone. And at this point, I am simply exhausted. Perhaps I need to find a stronger rope.

While it may not be possible to thank everyone as well as return the favor, the only way to truly say “Thank you” is to turn and catch the next person who is falling your way.

Sunday 7 October 2007

Swiss German (F)

Originally written in February 2006

I decided that the reason so many people smoke here is because you need all that phlegm in your throat to make those guttural sounds. If you have never heard Swiss German, let’s just say that it makes German sound like a romantic language.

When I interviewed I made it clear that I did not want to work with a bunch of Ex-Pats. We have some large engagements where less than half of the team, if even that, are Swiss….and I got what I asked for.

It is definitely an interesting experience to sit in an audit room where everyone ONLY speaks Swiss German unless they are talking directly to you. I was working with some Swiss guys all week and finally at lunch on Friday one of them mentioned in English that he had just bought his first car. I of course commented how exciting that was, but then he gave me a funny look and was like “Uh, I have been talking about this all week.”

Silence, awkward pause.

Then he turns to me and says, “Oh, yeah, you do not understand.”

I have since mastered the technique of attempting to smile at the appropriate time or give a quick nod when you are in the midst of a group of Swiss German speakers. This has been perfected to such an extent that on more than one occasion I have been able to deceive a passerby or someone standing next to you who makes a quick comment..or so I think…

I am “THAT WEIRD FOREIGNER!” (F)

Written originally and sent out in March 2006

As many people know, Switzerland is famous for its Swiss Alps and the skiing! Just as we have Spring Break in the States, they have Ski Week for the kids in Switzerland. Skiing is such a huge part of their life that each industry group within our firm has our very own ski weekend. So when ours came up in the end of March, I was excited to go.

But as I learn time and time again, nothing is simple in a foreign country, especially when you don’t speak the language.

Now, at this point, I had only worked on one project since I had joined the firm and had actually never even met anyone in my industry group, which happens to be almost entirely Swiss (well, we are in Switzerland). So early Saturday morning, a bit nervous as I did not really know anyone who would be there, I jumped into a car with 2 Swiss colleagues of mine who had offered a ride, and off we went to Arosa.

The last time I went skiing I was about 10 years old, hence I own no ski clothes, which are extremely expensive here. Solution? My good friend Kevin lent me his. So once we arrived, I timidly changed into his clothes which were about five sizes too big, rented some skis, and off I went.

Humility and humbleness are two emotions here which I have quickly learned. While I enjoyed myself on the weekend..I cannot even begin to describe to you how awkward an entire weekend of being that “weird foreigner” truly is. Now, while the Swiss love skiing, they also love stopping off at the outdoor lodges and grabbing a drink even more (men that is..most Swiss girls merely sip on a beer pretending to drink). The weather was amazingly warm, you could sit out in a T-shirt and there was a huge group of us sitting out on the tables drinking and chatting, well they were…

But I found myself, breakfast, lunch, and dinner, sitting quietly amongst everyone not understanding a clue as to what they were saying. Sometimes someone would eventually turn to me and explain in English, and sometimes they talked to you in English one and one, but the minute another Swiss person entered the conversation, it inevitably reversed back to Swiss German and then I would stand there dumbly smiling, with the song lyrics “Should I stay or should I go now?” resonating in my head, knowing I looked ridiculous just standing there while they knew I did not know what they were talking about, but also with nowhere to go unless I wanted to go stand in a corner alone staring at the wall.

Sometimes it is a bit like feeling like a helpless child, with people jabbering away discussing plans in which you can contribute nothing to the conversation, but have to stand there and wait until the decision is final so that someone can hopefully remember to turn to you and say in English, “We are meeting for lunch at 1pm” or “We are going to the next club now.”

However, I have found a few Swiss friends in my group, one girl offered to ski with me, and after our warm-up run down a bunny hill, we went up one of the lifts only to realize in horror at the top that it was only Black Diamonds on the way down. I have to admit I was scared s***less, but was extremely proud of myself after making it down, that is, until one of my Swiss co-workers, who had brought his 4 year old daughter along, points to one of the Black Diamond runs and tells me how he took his daughter down it on the last run. Talk about a shot to the ego…

Saturday night was a lot of fun, after a big Swiss cheese fondue in one of the lodges, the firm arranged for a bunch of sleds to be brought to the restaurant. And when I say sled, I mean the old classic wooden runners which get going so fast your life is in the hands of nature as you have absolutely no control, and of course, these sleds are made even more dangerous given the amount of alcohol we had been consuming throughout the day and dinner. So, in order to make it to the clubs below, we had to sled down the mountain on a track similar to a bobsled track, a bit wider, but I swear, just as fast. Immediately, my competitive manager, who is determined to make it down first, grabs a sled, grabs me and off we go full speed. Of course, it is not long before we go crashing around a corner, flipping over, and flying down the track in front of the entire group. Hmmm…notice the trend??? I seem to have a strange habit of embarrassing myself…

Thursday 4 October 2007

Die Zeit ist gekommen (R)

English version below :-)

Liebe Kolleginnen und Kollegen,

Die Zeit ist gekommen. Ich werde bald nach London fliegen und verlasse EY mit sehr gemischten Gefühlen: Traurig, ein Kapitel von meinem Leben zu beenden, aber gleichzeitig aufgeregt wegen den Abenteuer, die nun auf mich zu kommen. Ich will mich ganz herzlich bedanken, dass mir die Gelegenheit geboten wurde, die letzten Jahre hier verbringen zu dürfen, und besonders dankbar bin ich, für die vielen Momente, die ich mit so vielen bemerkenswerten Leuten verbringen durfte. In der Zeit bei EY konnte ich persönlich und beruflich viel lernen. Die Erfahrungen, die ich hier machen durfte, und ganz besonders die Beziehungen, die ich knüpfen konnte, hatten einen positiven Einfluss auf mein Leben und ich werde es nie vergessen.

Und für meine Basler Kollegen, bitte vergesst nie: „I have a dream..“

Sollte Sie mal in London sein, lassen Sie es mich wissen und schreiben Sie mir ein Mail.

Alles Gute für die Zukunft und lassen Sie uns in Verbindung bleiben.

Dear colleagues,

The time has come. I am flying out to London soon and leaving with very mixed feelings. Sad to be ending one chapter of my life, but excited for the adventures yet to come. I just wanted to say how thankful I am to have had the opportunity to be here, and especially how grateful I am to have worked with so many remarkable people. I have grown a tremendous amount the last couple of years, both personally and professionally. While many of you may not know it, as it is not always explicitly expressed, the experiences I have had here, and more importantly, the relationships I have built, have made a positive impact on my life and will not be forgotten.

And for my Basel colleagues, always remember “I have a dream…”

Should you ever be in London, be sure to drop me a line! Best of luck in the future and keep in touch!


Disclaimer of liability
As with all American things, I would like to direct your attention to the following disclaimer of liability prior to your reading of this blog.

#1: Please be aware that I write these posts keeping in mind that others may read them, and therefore try (key word "try") to make them somewhat entertaining. Therefore, while it is all true, I tend to put a very sarcastic twist on most of it, as is my nature. So, please do not find any offense to the following posts. If you do, then maybe we shouldn't be friends.

#2: For those of you who know me well, I have the attention span of a three-year old child and a pinball machine for a mind. I apologize in advance if I jump from one thought and/or event to the next. Please bear with me.

#3: For those of you who don't know me well, I really am a nice person..or so some tell me. So I hope I do not come across a bit strong. But do you really want to read a blog with the following: Today I took an airplane to Costa Rica. The woman I sat next to on the plane was very nice. We had an interesting conversation. The rainforests we drove through to the place I was staying were very beautiful. I am teaching at a school in Costa Rica. The children I work with are really great. Get the point?

#4: Yes, I do work. But I don't think you want to hear about my typical day of waking up at 5:30am going to work, sitting in front of a laptop for 12 hours doing very boring things, going to the gym, and then going to bed..often in a lonely hotel room, now do you?

#5 My intention of these posts is not to brag about all the places I have been. Believe me, living a nomadic lifestyle is a bit exhausting and often times I am even envious of those friends who are a bit more settled with their homes, friends, families, significant other, etc. In the journey of life, there are many paths to follow, and it is a good thing we do not all take the same one. Always keep in mind, the grass is always greener on the other side.I am therefore not liable for any offense taken.I hope you enjoy